Di Bawoh Rang Ikang Kering
Random Ramblings of A Retired Retainer


Monday, March 31, 2008
"I want to ask you something" is something that makes me uneasy. The Malay version is "Nak tanya sikit". The question might be perfectly ok with Customer Service people but to me, if you want to ask me something, ask away. Preambles are not necessary. What say you?

The question I am asking you readers (Muslim readers, particularly) is: Which affects your emotion most - The Fitna film (and today, the staging of The Satanic Verses in Potsdam) or the news that Safiah, the once child prodigy and ex-Oxford student chose to become a prostitute to make ends meet.

Let me know your thoughts.


Wednesday, March 26, 2008
It is human nature to make mistakes. After all, to err is human. But people will think you are less human if you insists that you have done nothing wrong and wondered aloud what are your sins when millions of people know what you did. Psychiatrists might diagnose you as in denial. Others might call you an idiot.

If you think I am referring to Terengganu's ex-MB or even our present PM, you are wrong. I am talking about Liverpool's midfielder Javier Maschareno who got two yellow cards in a row and ejected from the pitch last Sunday. He was adamant he did nothing wrong. Steve Bennet, the referee thought otherwise. Maschareno dissented. He went against the referee.

Is there some similarity between this and what happened in Terengganu?
Any similarity is coincidental. Heheh.

Labels: ,


Sunday, March 23, 2008
After several phone conversations with friends in Kuala Terengganu, I turned on Bernama TV at 12 noon to catch the latest news on the Terengganu MB "Saga". Bernama was the only news agency allowed into Istana Tetamu this morning.

On the 12 o'clock news on Channel 502, the lead item was recycling by Southern Waste Management Bhd and Mawar Hospital. News on recycling of politicians came very much later without visuals. The reader said the MB issue was settled. So much for Right and Now. The visuals came on the 12.30 news.

I turned on RTM1 and was a bit disappointed that the Warta Jam 1 did not start on time. Generasi Y overran by 1 minute. When it came on, the lead news was YB Ahmad Said receiving his watikah at Istana Tetamu followed by part of the Press Conference by YB Idris Jusoh who said "he accepted the decision although the rakyat is not happy". At least RTM's Newsroom still knows what headline news is.

Now, I , one of Terengganu's rakyat, do not give a tikus ass who the new MB is. I do not get any richer if A becomes the MB neither will I get any poorer than I already am if B is chosen instead. Terengganu's rakyat will get poorer if the wrong one is chosen though. Once, Terengganu was called "The Kuwait of Malaysia". Now, in spite of the oil royalty (or Wang Ehsan, if you prefer) Terengganu is in the list of states having the most hardcore poor:

Don't you see something wrong here?
Let us move on, shall we? Let us see what has been done and said.
Yesterday, YB Dato' Ahmad Said was chosen as the new MB. The Pemangku Raja, through Majlis Penasihat Pemangku Raja made the decision. Is it the right decision? You might get different answers from different persons. To me, I know two of the Royal Advisers personally although I have not spoken to any of them on their choice. Those two know the law. One is an experienced lawyer and the other an experienced judge who retired scandal-free. Whoever they chose among those available, I know that they made it with the welfare of the Terengganu people in mind.
Why then there are protests? That is the 1 billion ringgit question. Idris said "Accept the decision". The 22 ADUNs would not accept anyone else except Idris. Some said they will resign. The reason they gave was PM chose Idris as MB. I remember that Shahidan was also chosen by the PM but Isa Sabu became the MB. That was not too long ago was it? Some said Ahmad Said would be kicked out of UMNO if he accepted the MB's post. By the same argument, Isa Sabu and his supporters should be kicked out too, right? No? Why? Is it because Perlis has only delicious mangoes and no oil?
Whatever the argument is, one thing is clear. The 22 ADUNs in Terengganu are against their own Sultan. 21 of them are Malays. Malays call this derhaka. Treason is not part of the Rukunnegara. Get a school exercise book and read what it says at the back. Loyalty to the Sultan is not just to get datukship. I know you all read about Jebat and "Raja Adil Raja Di Sembah, Raja Zalim Raja Disanggah" (Pay homage to the just king. Defy him if not.) Just because the king does not choose your boss you think that the king is unjust. Read my previous posting about bosses. To the Dato's among the 22 ADUNs, be prepared to face the wrath of your datins when your datukship is withdrawn. Your datin might derhaka and refuse to be part of the process to make you a natural dato'.

Labels: ,


Monday, March 17, 2008
Last week we had a number of people trying their best (or their worst) to be the boss or remain the boss. It reminded me of a story that I read off a poster a long long time ago. Skip this if you have heard the story before.

Once upon a time the various parts of the body quarrelled on who should be the boss. The brain said " I think for all of you. I should be the boss".
"No!" said the eyes. "We see for all of you. We should be the boss."
"But we carry all of you everywhere," said the legs. "We should be the boss".
In the midst of all the noise they all heard a squeak. It was the anus. He too wanted to be the boss.
They all laughed at him. The anus took offence and clammed up.
In a few days the head became groggy and the brain could not function. The eyes became red and watery. The legs went wobbly and unsteady. They could not stand the anus clamming up. So they all decided to let him be the boss.
That is how the asshole became the boss.



Sunday, March 09, 2008
Congratulations to all the bloggers that won in the 12th GE.
No doubt blogs help.
Now it is up to the leaders to do the right thing. Take responsibility and take off.
But then, with some people it takes a hole in the head for things to get through.
Enough said.


Sunday, March 02, 2008

It is only 5 more days to Election Day and some of you are getting desperate.
Some of you might be tempted to seek help from bomohs. You might be frustrated enough or desperate enough to want your opponent’s left testicle/breast to quadruple in size, throb painfully and hang askew. That should stop your opponent from badmouthing you or exposing your dark deeds elegantly. My advice is, don’t do it. Generally bomohs do not owe allegiance to any mortals and most go for the highest bidder. Chances are, the bomoh might reverse the spell on you. Worse your victim could find a greater bomoh who could move your private parts from your crotch to the middle of your forehead. If this happens and you win nonetheless, you have to wear an underwear on your head which will land you in trouble because it goes against the Dress Code of your Dewan Negeri/Dewan Rakyat. Of course you too will have difficulties in the Yang Berhormats urinals unless you are a midget (physically, hopefully not intellectually).

Another drawback of using bomohs is, as any barkeep will tell you, people full of spirits are highly unstable and unpredictable. Just watch the denizens of bars, bistros and other watering holes and you know what I mean. With unstable bomohs you might end up in several pieces like a late YB that I knew. May he rest in peace.I am sure entering The Dewan in several separate pieces is frowned upon, if not totally unacceptable.

So what do you when you need extra help? You have to seek higher powers. No, I do not mean your party president. Ask for divine help. If you are sincere in what you do, God will help you. So, if you know of suitable doas (prayers), start reciting them. Otherwise you have to look for a reputable guru to teach some prayers to weather the storm. The problem is most of this gurus, although free, impose strict conditions. The pantangs include speaking the truth all the time. The gall of the guru. Politicians telling the truth all the time? You can live with that? Well and good. You might make it into the record as the first truthful politician in the country. You deserve to stick out your tongue at all and sundry. Show them you do not have a forked tongue.

But there is a hitch. You have to recite the doa for 40 days. No breaks allowed. By the time your body and spirit assimilate the power, election is already over. Tough. Well, nobody says politics is easy.

Incidently, politics=poly means many, ticks means bloodsucking creatures.

Labels: , ,