Di Bawoh Rang Ikang Kering
Random Ramblings of A Retired Retainer


Friday, July 29, 2005
(In honour of Kucing Gatal's first visit to my blog, this post shall be rated SX18.)

My lecturer was right. The Javanese have more words about rice than the Malaysian Malays. Thanks to all who contributed.
I just remembered that there is more to rice than making you full. And there are many kinds of nasik as stated in the previous posts comments. There are famous and infamous nasi. You have heard of nasi kangkang, I am sure. That is the rice (not sure whether it is in a pot or in a plate) that has gone between , or under the legs of a woman who wanted her man to be under her command. Food for thought indeed eh guys?
On the flip side, there is nasi kepal. Nasi kepal, rice balled by the fist, with a few choice verses will make a man fiesty in bed. Nasi kepal can make a man be like Exide batteries: Starts Stronger, Lasts Longer. It works. I can have a few people in the East Coast testify to this. People who eat rice with fork and spoons cannot be taught this secret though.
To last really long, nothing beats the antah - the padi grain inadvertently left in cooked rice. I used "inadvertently" because all Malaysian ladies in the villages will try their best to hunt for the antah in the rice and remove them before cooking the rice.. This, in Terengganu is called pilih beras (literally: selecting rice). They usually pour the rice in a tray made of woven bamboo called badang in Terengganu. For some reason or the other, however meticulous the process is, an antah or two will find its way into the rice pot and subsequently into your plate. If you are a man, and you are suffering from a hair-trigger problem, do not be angry if you find an antah in your plate. Be thankful instead. It can help you with your PE problem. Keep the antah in your pocket. The next time you want to make love to your wife, slip the antah under your tongue. The Guru said you won't come until the antah swells. Although I didn't try this myself, I casually mentioned this to our department driver while having lunch at a table not very far from our boss. The boss is a veritable Scrooge and he preferred to lunch alone even though the three of us were travelling together. Our driver at that time just married a young wife and he was grateful for the tip. I was not sure whether the boss heard us, but we could see that he suddenly became interested in his rice.
For men on Atkins Diet and not allowed any form of carbohydrates, they cannot possibly hunt for antah. For you, I can tell what Pok Ya of the Wok Sir group told me. Pok Ya spoke of a Tok Ayoh in a village at the end of the Kota Bharu bridge. This Tok Ayoh could massage your burung so that you won't miss a beat even after climaxing. Philanderers be careful though. Tok Ayah could tell who you have been sleeping with. If he is satisfied that it is your wife that you are going to please, he will customise your burung accordingly. Last I heard, Tok Ayah passed away but not without passing his techniques to his son. So go look for him in the kampung at the end of the Kota Bharu bridge on the way to Pasir Pekan. It's easy to find. Just look for the village where all the women in look happy and extremely contented.