KITAB POK OD

I must warn readers that today's topic is somewhat unsuitable for minors and unmarried people. It is also unsuitable for virgins of any age or prigs (regardless of pristine status). If you fall into these categories, please go somewhere else.

My friend Pok Od or Pok Daud Basikal to some, found an old kitab (religious book). The gist of the kitab is a warning to all husbands to be careful when making love to the wife. Make love when you are too full and you will end up with a benok (dense) child. There are other warnings that Pok Od loved to pass on to friends especially Pok Ramli who already has 12 kids (from one wife) and an indeterminate number of grandchildren. The kitab also espouses missionary position. I read somewhere that this is the only position available to the Orthodox Jews with one extra prerequisite: It must be done in the dark or the lady's face must be covered. If you listen to Pok Od, any acrobatic ala Kamasutra would bring forth kids with numerous afflictions.

I regret not being able to list out Pok Od's rules, the causes and effects, because I stopped paying attention to him. I remembered something in the Quran that one's wife is like one's field to be tilled as one pleases including but not limited to the missionary position. Pok Od didn't buy this argument and branded Ramli and I as kerah keng (hard jaws) and at times keng temaga (brass jaws).

In Terengganuspeak, kerah keng or keng temaga is used for argumentative people who would never concede defeat in any argument or debate. They want to have the last word or the last retort. There is no equivalent in Standard Bahasa that I can think of. Only "menegakkan benang basah" (trying to make a wet thread upright) comes to mind. You can't argue with people with keng temaga. You just leave them alone and hope that they will someday become tenacious trial lawyers.

Back to Pok Od. After being single for over 5 years, Pok recently got married to a virgin past her customary marrying age. It will be interesting to see if Pok Od still uses his kitab.