Di Bawoh Rang Ikang Kering
Random Ramblings of A Retired Retainer


Monday, May 16, 2005
I have been tagged. In Terengganuspeak, we call it cok. But the Lucia who tagged me is a nice person, so I will be sporting and oblige. Lucia gave a list of occupations and I have to choose 5:
If [reader] could be a scientist // If [reader] could be a farmer
if [reader] could be a musician // If [reader] could be a doctor
If [reader] could be a painter // If [reader] could be a gardener
If [reader] could be a missionary // If [reader] could be a chef
If [reader] could be an architect // If [reader] could be a linguist
If [reader] could be a psychologist // If [reader] could be a librarian
If [reader] could be an athlete // If [reader] could be a lawyer
If [reader] could be an innkeeper // If [reader] could be a professor
If [reader] could be a writer // If [reader] could be a backup dancer
If [reader] could be a llama-rider // If [reader] could be a bonnie pirate
If [reader] could be a midget stripper // If [reader] could be a proctologist
If [reader] could be a TV-Chat Show host // If [reader] could be a pariah
If [reader] could be an actor // If [reader] could be a judge
If [reader] could be a jedi // If [reader] could be a mob boss
If [reader] could be a backup singer // If [reader] could be a CEO
If [reader] could be a movie reviewer // If [reader] could be a monkey's uncle
If [reader] could be a bible archaeologist //If [reader] could be a househusband
If [reader] could be a lifeguard //If [reader] could be a comic artist

It is a tough choice. I wouldn't want to be a missionary. The position is boring. Much as Ilike to see a well-shaped derrier, I rather not get into details, so a proctologist is out. Pain in the rear, if you ask me. One could not list a pariah as an occupation. The same goes for llama-rider.

So , having said all that, here is my choice:

1. If I could be a linguist I would scold all the visible traffic offenders and uncaring people in exotic languages so they will go and learn the language (after learning the traffic and civic rules)

2. If I were a doctor (with my own clinic) I would make sure that all the magazines in the waiting room are at least only 2 months old. Older magazines would be given to the nearest barber.

3. If I were a bonnie pirate, I would only raid smuggler's ships. I will also make sure that pirates with wooden legs have proper documents. This is to prevent the following conversation:
- I have a friend with a wooden leg named Tempang.
-What is the name of his other leg?

4. If I were a mob boss, I would give everyone an offer they couldn't refuse. I also have to learn to talk with my mouth full.

5. If I were a monkey's uncle, I would forever berate my brother for marrying a monkeyand not practising Family Planning. Then I will corner the banana market.

(I will spare my friends so there will be no 3 names here. But, anyone wishing to try can carry on)